Alan Tregoning - Screenwriter
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Picture

Delivered (2011)

This was written, shot and edited for the Dallas 48hr film contest 2011. The film had to include the following elements: Character: Dennis or Debbie Karlsen, Waiter or Waitress. Prop: a ball. Line of Dialogue: "When do you need it?". The genre selected was Thriller/Suspense.


Here is the 48 Hour film version

Delivered from Alan Tregoning on Vimeo.


Delivered
by
Alan Tregoning & Jason Walter Vaile




               INT. PIZZA PARLOUR-DAY

               A young waitress trudges down a staircase.  Her name tag
               reads: DEBBIE.  She tosses her tray and apron on the counter.

                                   ZINI (O.S.)
                         Karlsen!

                                   DEBBIE
                         I'm off.

               Zini walks out of the kitchen wiping his hands.

                                   ZINI (CONT'D)
                         Delivery.

                                   DEBBIE
                         Since when's that my job?  Where's
                         Brandon?

                                   ZINI
                         Douche bag called in sick again.

                                   DEBBIE
                         What about my daughter?  It's my
                         weekend. 

                                   ZINI
                         Whatever.

               Slides the pizza bag to her.



               EXT. MANSION-DAY
               INSERT ADDRESS BLOCK: 5107 KELSEY RD

               Pull back to reveal...A finely crafted stately manor.  



               INT. KELSEY-DAY

               MATT, a dad in his forties, whips through the family room
               gathering his briefcase and jacket.  His daughter, TENNA, is
               flopped on the couch glued to the TV watching SANCTUARY.  Her
               nanny, TAMARA, is texting on her phone.  People are being
               shot and dying on the show.  Matt sees the violence.

                                   MATT
                         Seriously?  

               He turns it off.

                                   TENNA
                         Hey.

               SFX: DOOR BELL 

               Tamara is oblivious and continues texting.

                                   MATT
                         Why don't I get that?  Pizza's
                         here, go wash up.

               Tenna begrudgingly stomps off.

               SFX: PHONE RINGS 

               Matt answers

                                   MATT
                         Yeah, I'm out the door.



               INT. ENTRY-CONTINUOUS

               Matt is opening the door and getting out his wallet. He opens
               the door to reveal not a pizza girl but DOUG and NICOLE.

                                   MATT
                         Are you kidding me?  When do you
                         need it?

                                   DOUG
                         How about right now?  

               Nicole steps forward and pops Matt right in the face with her
               fist.  Matt falls unconscious to the entry floor.  Nicole
               nods towards the study.

                                   NICOLE
                         Get him in there.



               INT. KITCHEN-CONTINOUS

               Tamara is still texting away.  Suddenly a knife is held up to
               her throat.  Tamara looks up and is about to scream.  Nicole
               holds her finger to her lips.

                                   NICOLE
                         Shhhhh.

               She gently takes the phone from Tamara.  She slides some zip
               ties on her hands.

               IN THE HALLWAY

               Doug drags Matt towards the study.

               IN THE KITCHEN

               Nicole is typing on the console in the kitchen.  Brings up
               the security cameras and sees a car pull into the drive way.  

                                   NICOLE
                         We're about to have some company.



               INT. STUDY-CONTINUOUS

               Doug is distracted by the signed baseballs on the mantle.  

                                   DOUG
                         Mantle. Ruth.  Josh Hamilton!!

               He plucks that one from the mantle.  He turns to see Debbie
               looking at the unconscious Matt on the floor and up to him. 
               He holds the ball up for her to see.

                                   DOUG (CONT'D)
                         It's a Josh Hamilton.

               Debbie turns to run. But Nicole is blocking the front door.

                                   NICOLE
                         Behave.

               Debbie stares at the knife for a beat, what can she do...

               Debbie clobbers Nicole in the face with the pizza bag and
               dashes up the stairs.



               INT. MECHANICAL CLOSET-CONTINUOUS

               Debbie runs in and slams the door shut.  She looks around. 
               Dead end.  There is a large tower of electronic equipment in
               one corner.  An access door in the other.  She looks out the
               access door into the attic and sees a small walkway.  

               As Debbie closes the access door behind her, Nicole opens the
               closet door.  She sees the equipment tower.

                                   NICOLE
                             (Shouting)
                         I found it.  Bring your laptop.



               INT. ATTIC-CONTINUOUS

               Debbie crawls through the small walkway.



               INT. MECHANICAL CLOSET-CONTINUOUS

               Doug walks in.  Sees the equipment.

                                   DOUG
                         Bingo!  

               He cracks his knuckles and jacks in.



               INT. ATTIC-CONTINUOUS

               Debbie pops out in another bigger attic area.  She finds
               another door back into the house.  She peaks out, the coast
               is clear.  Across the hall is a bedroom with a balcony.



               INT. ATTIC-CONTINUOUS

               Nicole is crawling through the small space Debbie began in.



               INT. BEDROOM-DAY

               Debbie darts across the hall to the bedroom.  She peaks out
               the balcony and can see her car below.  A small whimper comes
               from under the bed.  Debbie spins to see Tenna hiding behind
               the bed crying. She is torn, does she make a break for the
               balcony or help Tenna.  

                                   DEBBIE
                         It's OK.  I'm not one of them.

               She reaches for the balcony doors.

                                   TENNA
                         They're locked.

                                   DEBBIE
                         So how do we get out?

               Tenna points to a control panel on the nightstand.  It has a
               schematic of the floor plan.

                                   TENNA
                         Maybe the garage?

               Nicole pops out of the closet.  Debbie shoves Tenna down.

                                   NICOLE
                             (Shouting)
                         She's loose.  Lock it down.

               IN THE MACHINE ROOM

                                   DOUG
                         I'm on it.

               Alarm count down begins.



               INT. BACK STAIRS-CONTINUOS

               Debbie and Tenna sneak down.  Tamara is bound to a chair.  

                                   DEBBIE
                         Open the garage, I'll get her.

               Debbie frees Tamara.  The count down on alarm is still
               ticking.  Garage door is opening.



               INT. UPSTAIRS-CONTINUOUS

               Nicole looks out the window and sees the door opening.

                                   NICOLE
                         Shut the North Garage door!



               INT. MECHANICAL CLOSET-CONTINUOUS

               Doug hits some buttons.



               INT. GARAGE-CONTINUOUS

               Debbie, Tenna and Tamara see the door begin to close.  Debbie
               shoves them in front.

                                   DEBBIE
                         Get out.  Get help!

               She shoves them under the door ala Indiana Jones.  Debbie
               can't make it.  The door closes.  



               INT. LIVING ROOM-CONTINUOUS

               Debbie creeps around cautiously.  She picks up a praying monk
               statue for protection.



               INT. MECHANICAL CLOSET-CONTINUOUS

               Doug is typing away.

                                   DOUG
                         Done.  Transfer complete.  Lets get
                         out of here.

               Doug snaps the laptop shut.



               INT. KELSEY-DAY

               Debbie stalks around the room, monk statue poised and ready.



               INT. STAIRS-CONTINUOUS

               Doug charges down the stairs.  

                                   DOUG
                         Let's go.  Let's go.

               Doug almost runs into Debbie at the bottom of the stairs. 
               Debbie clobbers him with the monk statue.  Lays him out.  The
               ball rolls out of his pocket.

               CLICK.  Debbie turns to find Nicole aiming a gun at her.

                                   NICOLE
                         I thought I told you to behave.

               Matt groans distracting Nicole.  Debbie grabs the baseball
               and pegs it at Nicole's head.  Nicole staggers back.  Debbie
               steps forward and pops Nicole in the face, knocking her out
               cold.  She grabs the gun and trains it on Nicole.

               Matt looks up at Debbie.

                                   MATT
                         Are you a cop?

                                   DEBBIE
                         No, I'm just the waitress.

                                                         FADE TO BLACK.
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  • Home
  • About Me
  • Awards
  • Produced Work
    • Short FIlms >
      • Riva (2015)
      • Dig (2015)
      • Harper Abbott (2014)
      • Possessed (2013)
      • Static (2012)
      • The Code (2011)
      • Second Glances (2011)
      • Clip (2011)
      • Delivered (2011)
      • Sanctuary (2010)
      • Adoptation (2010)
      • The Dead House Guest (2010)
      • Metal Sandwich (2009)
      • Ronnie's Restaurant (2009)
    • Kid's Shows >
      • iShine Knect
      • Wright's Direction
      • Living With Fish
      • The Book of Destiny
      • The Big Picture
  • Contact Me